Mayonnaise is a mixture of oil, egg yolks and vinegar, all of which are very bad for you, and on their own taste pretty awful. Have you ever tried drinking vegetable oil or vinegar?
But together, they are a semi-liquid fat emulsion, a concentrated form of energy at 3,212 BTUs per ounce, that could be used to run alternative fuel vehicles.
Imagine the benefits:
Weight loss - we eat far too much mayonnaise as it is so it should instead be stored until it goes bad and then ladled into gas tanks. The medical establishment has concluded that mayonnaise is the 3rd leading cause of obesity and diabetes after laziness (#2) and watching repeat episodes of Psych (#1).
Less reliance on foreign oil. We would no longer have to care about insane dicators who spend just a little too much time out in the desert sun wearing tightly wrapped turbans.
Convenience - you would no longer have to stop at a gas station every morning. Just take the mayo out of the fridge (or storage closet if you want the really ripe stuff) as you kiss the dog/cat/cockatoo/missus/mister goodbye and head off to work.
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